Author Archives: From-Full

Last week, my six year old and I were talking after he’d just had a friend over to our house to play. “Mom, I want go to his house soon!” he said to me. To which I replied, “Oh that would be fun! But we don’t invite ourselves over, ok?”

Fast forward a week- and that same friend’s mom, who happens to be my good friend, was having a rough day and feeling overwhelmed by housework, so what did I do? Invited us over lol. Me- to help her clean, and C to play with her boys. And it was great!

Honestly- I love it when a friend feels close enough to me to allow me to come visit and clean with them. There’s something about them- or someone who is comfortable enough to curl up on the sofa and fall asleep in my house- that is just a special level of real and comfortable!

I left that visit fully recharged, as did she I think. And I know it wasn’t just because of the Alani’s we enjoyed as we were cleaning. 😉

Two days later- and this time I was the one feeling overwhelmed. Like a-crazy-high-level-of-spiritual-warfare overwhelmed, immediately after teaching a solitude class on encountering the enemy in solitude. (Predictable, huh? 😬 😣)

I was so overwhelmed with emotions and thoughts that I left the sanctuary and went to my van for a good cry and to try to pray my way out of it.

When that didn’t work, I messaged a few friends a quick “need prayer ASAP” message. And then I did something I wouldn’t normally do- I asked one of them, desperately, if I could drive to her house today (an hour away), and visit with her. Because she’s in a very similar place in life that I am right now, and as I was pleading with God to tell me who I could go to to share this particular burden, who would understand, He brought her to mind. And I knew she wouldn’t mind me asking. So I did. And she said yes.

After church was over, my husband took me through the DQ drive-in to grab a bite to eat (because sometimes hanger can make emotions worse, you know 😉). But before we dug in, he could tell that it was more severe than that this time, and he did some deep prayer over me- calling things off that were attacking my mind, speaking Truth over lies, caring for soul wounds that had cut deep into me that day- more deeply than made rational sense at all. But emotions aren’t always logical- are they?

By the time he finished up with me, I felt worlds better! And exhausted. I came home, processed a little with God, and took a long and much-needed nap, followed by dinner and a normal bedtime.

By morning, I honestly didn’t feel like I NEEDED the friend visit anymore, but I still wanted to go- just because we hadn’t gotten a chance to have a good, long visit in awhile. So I messaged again to let her know, and to make sure it was okay that I still come- even if it wasn’t so urgent.

Literally I was thinking in my head “Wow, Daylene, you just invited yourself over. Who does that? Didn’t you just tell C that we don’t do that?”

And it’s not that I haven’t dropped in and basically invited myself in to someone’s house before, because I have. But usually to check on them. Not as much for me. Even though I always enjoy the visit.

Or I invite them over to my house.
Because that’s proper etiquette, right?

“We don’t just invite ourselves over to someone else’s house (because we want to).”

Wrong.

Literally, as I was thinking this- and having a self-judging battle in my brain, Jesus spoke up to me in an inner voice and said… “Remember when I invited myself over to Zaccheus’s house? 😉 You used to sing about it all the time.”

(If you grew up in church, or you have a kiddo in Sunday school now, you’re probably singing along in your head right now… 🎶 “Zacheus was a wee little man and a wee little man was he…” 🤪)

Anyway- I had a good laugh as I realized He was right. (Of course He was!) And that maybe this lifelong “rule” that we shouldn’t invite ourselves over to someone’s house actually needs to be pitched… because you know what? Sometimes it’s a blessing for BOTH the self-inviter AND the one who gets a pop-in visit.

Today was great.
Just what I needed!
So was Friday.

One-being the helped.
One- being the helper.
But both actually, were both.

Mutual blessing.

Togetherness.

Real. Raw. Unfiltered friendship.

No need for pretense or putting on a brave face, or even mustering up optimism and hope (though it does tend to arise, naturally, as a result of visits like this!)

Oh, if only all friendships could be like this!

I’m going to go out on a limb (cue the Zacheus pun here 😉) and challenge you this season, if this isn’t already a way of life for you:

Forget that old “polite” rule.

Be spontaneous.

Invite yourself over to a friend’s house.

Bring some coffee and a few paper cups, if it helps break the ice a little. (It always does for me.)

And know that if you prayed about it and God showed you which friend to visit- she probably needs it as much as you do! ❤️

Curious Question: What are some of your favorite book series for kids and teens? 

This week I found myself unexpectedly taking a trip down memory lane! And then I decided to take C there with me! 

It started on Wednesday when I drove C to his Bible club and A to her youth group. They’re both in the same area, and far enough from home that instead of going back and forth twice I prefer to hang out in the little town nearby and find something to do. This would be a challenge since it’s literally tiny and there isn’t much there, but anywhere I can find a good place to read or to write, is the perfect place for me! 🥰 

Theres’s a little library open, so I decided to drop in. I’ve only gone in there on one other occasion- and it was glorious because it was actually quiet, which is rare even in a library these days! I remember that time, finding a cozy chair to curl up in, in front of a fake fire place- but with a real glow about it that was enough to have my soul sighing in a happy way. 🔥 

So this week, I went in again, hoping for a repeat experience, but finding someone else in that chair, and the noise level a bit louder. A staff member could tell I didn’t know my way around, and asked if they could help, and when I shared that I was just looking for a comfy place to read- they pointed me up a flight of stairs to a lofted area that fit the bill nicely. 

I laughed when I went to sit down in the couch and this guy was sitting on the other end. I decided to be silly and take a selfie with it. There’s just something about a new place that makes me feel like an adventurer, and gives me a curious and childlike mind- eager to see what I see and to capture in photos like a tourist, the things that catch my eye! ✨ The monkey definitely caught my eye lol. 

The next thing that captured my attention, as I admired the sky and the autumn leaves outside the windows which were placed along the whole top of the building like picture frames, calling my attention toward something higher than books, and higher than buildings, and then back down…to the shelves below the windows…was this boxcar. It was a prop that libraries must have been able to get, to go along with the Boxcar Children book series! I had forgotten all about those books!

A sense of nostalgia came over me, as my mind drifted back to reading them as a kid. Or rather, I think with this particular book series, I listened as a teacher of mine read these books to our class. As an adult, I prefer to read my own books vs. listening to someone else read them, but in this moment I remember- like a scent transports you back to the emotions of a moment- the delightful adventure that it was to listen to her voice, and wonder with my imagination, and picture all of the characters doing whatever it was they were doing as the story unfolded, and wait in anticipation for the story to turn the bends where the unknown becomes known. Like a river journey! 

I had one hour in that library loft, between dropping my kids off and picking them back up. One hour of solitude with God, spent unexpectedly – not according to my plan, and not totally UNaccording to plan either. It was the perfect combination of both! 

Have you ever watched the water whirl around an oar as you paddle a kayak down a river? If you pause and paddle intentionally, and watch, you’ll see a delightful swirling of water. The intentions were to propel yourself forward, but the action actually set off a spinning motion in the aquatic environment around you. Observation becomes delight. Delight is often found for me in the smallest of details! 

Anyway…that is how I felt this day, in this library loft. Sitting beside a stuffed monkey. Looking at a forgotten Boxcar. Being magically transported through time, to a simpler season, and just being read to and allowing a story to unfold before me instead of mapping it all out and creating it. Wonder and imagination. I was transported back to a moment of wonder and imagination, and it was wonderful!

So wonderful that I came home and ordered the first set of Boxcar children books for my six-year-old son. I got as excited as a kid when it came in! 

I pulled him up on my lap, cozy in his pajamas, almost too big to be sitting there- but small enough, still, that I’m going to soak it up for as long as I can. 

And we began:

Chapter one- he had all the questions. 

Chapter two- we started to see which direction the story was swirling. 

By the end of chapter two, he was enchanted as well. 

“Mom! They are going to live in a boxcar! I can’t wait to read about it!”

It was in this moment I wondered with a laugh if this is where the tiny-house movement and shipping-container house ideas were born. From a generation of kids remembering the whimsical delight of Boxcar children books?! 

I tucked him in bed and thanked God for the adventure that reading is. 

The adventure that our world is- 

that even the tiniest, smallest-town places, tucked away in a lofted corner

of who-knows-where- 

can be such a joy! 

Jesus can unlock such surprise and delight, anywhere! 

He Himself is the adventure, really. 

Did you know the first part of that word- ADVENT- literally means Christ coming? 

He puts the advent in adventure! 

Life with Jesus is such a joy ride! 

I never used to wear makeup daily. 

First of all, I wanted my skin to breathe. I struggled with acne a lot even into my twenties and early thirties, and makeup always seemed to make it worse. 

But second, I stopped caring for myself as much as I should. 

I don’t know when it happened, but somewhere along the line in my working from home I got too comfortable being effortless in my appearance for my husband, as if going out was worth the hassle but if it was only going to be him and the kids that saw me, it wasn’t worth my time. And then- I stopped putting effort into my appearance, even going out most places. 

I suppose I was comfortable enough in his love for me, that I let comfort become complacency. And then- as I began to focus more on the spiritual, and the demands on me in the physical began to grow (more kids, more activities, more ministry needs)… I reasoned that I had more important tasks to put effort into than my hair and makeup. Honestly, I couldn’t even bring myself to spend 10 minutes on something like this for myself. And if I did have the time, I’d have rather spent it reading or doing some other soul-enriching activity. 

(This may sound silly, if you’ve never gone through it. But if you have- or if you are- I know it’ll help to hear someone who can relate. And while I don’t claim to have any answers, or that makeup is some magical solution, or that I’m even good at it 😆— I do hope that sharing some things God has walked me through will help someone. It’s why I take the time to process anything, publicly. 😉)

So— in this season of life, my paid work is cleaning houses for clients. I love getting to provide hospitality to them in their own homes! I enjoy the satisfaction of seeing the difference of each before and after, and how everything not only looks better but smells better, and the home just literally feels better when I am done— more fresh, more welcoming, more comforting and I know they’ll get to come home and enjoy it! 

One thing about cleaning houses is that I usually do it when my clients are not home. So in the beginning I rarely did my hair or wore makeup. Honestly, it just wasn’t logical to me. Why spend time on my appearance when I’m going to be scrubbing toilets and floors and getting icky, and have to come home and clean myself up again anyway? It just didn’t feel worth it. Maybe, more accurately, God has since shown me that I didn’t feel worth it. I had no problems cleaning houses, because my family felt worth it to provide for and my client felt worth it to clean for. But when it came to my own appearance, I didn’t feel worth the effort or time. Especially when it was going to be just me- alone. 

But one day, God spoke to me. Unexpectedly. 

Gently. 

Lovingly. 

Fatherly. 

I’ll never forget it- I was standing at my washing machine, dumping out bags of soiled cleaning rags, to be washed and bleached and refreshed— made new again for the next day, the next client. 🧺 

And He said to my heart… “Would you wash your kitchen counter, or your 6-year old’s face, with these dirty rags? Would you give them to your husband to wash his face with?” I replied back — in thought, but just as exclamatory- “Eew! Of course not!” 🤢 It made me ill just thinking about it. What a disturbing visual. 😳 

And then for the revelation, both raw and hard to hear, but also true, and much needed. 

It was about my thoughts, which first needed addressed, and about the importance of margin… but He has since worked with me about the value of my appearance also. 

He said, “Daylene… this is how you’re coming home to your husband, and to me. You’re working hard, and as you’re out in the world and ministering to people and doing deliverance prayer and you’re getting messy. Inevitably some of the world’s stuff is getting on you. Comparison. Worry. Concerns that are not yours to carry. (You were only meant to lift them up to me.) And more. And you’re not taking any time to clean up your mind or your self before you move on to love and serve your family, or spend time together with me. And that’s why you are emotional and so easily agitated. You need to take your time in transitions, for the resetting of your mind, just like you take time between clients for the resetting of your supplies. It is not selfish, it’s part of serving well.” 🤯 

And as He led me into scripture, again and again I see Jesus doing this. Going to the mountain, slipping away from  the crowds, taking solo-with-His-Father-time. Filling up. Resetting. Then coming back down to serve the next ones. 

The spiritual was relatively simple for me to understand and embrace. The physical has been the next step. And I feel like this is pretty common, especially for women in leadership and service in the Church. There are so many needs- who has time to attend to our own selves? And not just our souls but something as “fleshy” as our appearance— our literal flesh? Isn’t that worldly to be concerned about that anyway? Isn’t it selfish? And isn’t it superficial that our Christian men would desire it, would focus their attention on our flesh instead of on the spiritual and in service? 

I don’t know that I would have said any of this- but these were underlying reasonings that were going on in my head, as I went though the motions, day in and day out, without taking time to care for myself.

But slowly and surely over the past year or so, God has been leading me to resources. Guidance. He’s been reshaping my thoughts. Healing my emotions. Helping me understand that just because He calls us to serve others doesn’t mean He wants us to neglect the care of our own selves. And, in fact, we can actually honor Him by caring for our bodies and taking time to refresh ourselves. Better yet, we can use the time we spend putting on makeup and straightening our hair, to remind ourselves to intentionally reset our thoughts and our hearts as well. What if we saw it as our “war paint” against the enemy? 🤔 ⚔️ 🎨 

(A friend told me once, that she pictured herself armoring up spiritually as she puts her makeup on physically each morning. I loved that! I’m borrowing it now! 💋)

I still don’t spend much time on hair or makeup. 10 minutes usually, and I’m done. But it feels like a “splurge” when I didn’t allow myself that gesture of hospitality, or consider myself worthy of it before. 

But God showed me that— just like when my home is refreshed and looks its best, I- it’s inhabitant- feel much better… 

and just like it’s important that I don’t clean for other clients so much that I neglect my own home, my family’s home…

I am the Holy Spirit’s home on this Earth. 

He abides in me. 

He lives in me. 

You are His home too, if you have received Jesus as your Savior and invited Him in. 

He abides in and lives in you too!

When we take time to refresh ourselves, to look our best and more importantly- when we make margin in our lives to regularly “clean house” in our minds by taking each thought to be processed and “bleached” by God, we honor Him. We provide Him a clean home. A clean heart to abide in. We serve Him with Holy Hospitality. 

Also, some of us have been called into the spiritual  “cleaning business”. We have been called to faith leadership and service positions beyond our own homes, to help others through soul care, cleaning and processing their past and their hurts and thoughts and emotions with the Word and Holy Spirit. For us, it is imperative that we don’t get so caught up in doing this that we neglect our own homes— whether that be our actual households, or our own minds/souls.  It is easy to come to a place, with all good intentions, of saying yes to others’ needs so much that we leave no margin for our personal lives or investing in our marriages (including the investment of caring for our physical appearance, in order to honor and bring pleasure to our spouse) or families.

But when we do so- we actually reveal a root of pride that causes us to consider ourselves more important to the mission than we are, or like it’s on us to care for everyone and forget that we are a Kingdom team— and that God has MANY servants reaching out to the lost and those needing healing and deliverance and counseling and comfort. Just another area He can help renew our minds in. 😉 

We must remember we are important enough that the Kingdom will suffer (and we will miss out on joy) if we don’t do what God called us to do, but we are not so important that God’s mission won’t be fulfilled if we don’t do MORE than our capacity to do, and in fact- our missions at home might suffer if we try to. That’s a challenging concept to walk out! I trip daily. Thankfully He wipes me up and washes my tears and my messy face and mind again and again. Then He bleaches the rag, and helps me begin each new day, fresh. ☀️ Ready to war-paint up! 

The makeup still has nothing to do with the makeup. It just gives me an opportunity to look in the mirror each day and see God’s grace, and put His grit in my heart again until I can see it in my eyes. And only then I am more prepared to serve anyone else well. 

My brother in law’s shirt caught my eye the other day, as we had our boys at the park playing together.

“We help people walk through walls.”

I was intrigued- but didn’t get it. So I asked.

“Oh, it’s my work” he said. “We make doors.”

Ahhh! Made total sense now that I understood.

It was nothing too deep. But I couldn’t get it out of my head. Something about that phrase stuck with me. The fact that doors help people walk through walls is obvious, I had just never heard it stated before.

Part of a verse fluttered around in mind:

“I am the door,” Jesus said…

John‬ ‭10‬:‭9‬-‭10‬ ‭NKJV‬‬- “I am the door. If anyone enters by Me, he will be saved, and will go in and out and find pasture. The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.”

Beautiful verse. I tucked it away in my heart and didn’t think much more, until today.

I was cleaning for a client, and I noticed this “hidden cross” on her laundry room door. The light danced on it in a way that caught my eye, and I began thinking of doors again and walking through walls.

Are there any “walls” that you need to walk through, in your life?

Anything that’s necessary or desirable, but appears equally as impossible, to get through?

Have you been trying to break through those walls of circumstance on your own?

What if there were a door that could help you walk through that wall?

For so many years, I was trained to see the impossible and walk right through it. Take insurmountable goals, break them down into bite-sized chunks and “eat my elephant”, “get-r-done.” But that’s not always Jesus’s way.

If we ask Him…

If we knock on the Door…

He will answer.

In Jeremiah 33:3 God says, “Call to Me, and I will answer you, and show you great and mighty things, which you do not know.”
‭‭

If we will just go to Him, He will answer us.

He will show us the way.

He will make a way where there was no way.

He will be the door.

Here is an example of this from my own life. Back in the Spring, my husband and I’s vehicles were both out of commission. It’s too long of a story to share here, but we will just say that this was one of the walls we were facing at the time. And there didn’t seem to be any way through.

I began to reason with my old way of thinking, and started looking for used cars. I also opened up a job-search app, assuming that I was going to have to find a full-time job in order for us both to be able to get vehicles. That’s just what you do, right? Take on more debt? And then work more to try and dig your way out of it?

But I didn’t have peace. Rates were crazy high on vehicle loans. And the job descriptions in the search engine were obviously going to cause me to have to rearrange other priorities— that God had been working on realigning for years. I didn’t want to go right back to where I started— unless that was where God was wanting me to go for this season (which is a possibility- sometimes He does take us back to old places as new people.)

So I prayed. I “knocked on His door.” I asked Him to show me the way. And I kept feeling, in this case, that I was to stay the course. I was to keep my part-time cleaning work, not look for a full-time job. We were to sell our camper. A few days after we listed it, it sold. A God-blessing that gave us the money to pay for my husband’s replacement truck, which God also made available and exactly-affordable in divine timing!

So now we were in need of just one vehicle. “Just” in that sentence makes it seem like a small need, but it really wasn’t. Sharing a vehicle is doable, for sure, but it makes logistics of going to different day jobs and evening groups really difficult. I found myself getting impatient and again, looking up used vehicles and questioning whether I had heard wrong about taking on more work. But I still didn’t have peace about either of those.

Then my mom came to my house one day and said that she wanted to give me her van! I’m pretty sure my jaw hit the floor. I did not see God answering my prayer that way, but what a blessing! It’s old and it’s got its flaws but I don’t even care- it is PERFECT! And every time I drive it I smile, because it was a personal gift of pure grace from both my mom, and my Heavenly Father! And it was a wall that I couldn’t walk through…that He helped me walk through… provided a door for!

Not long after, it became obvious why I wasn’t to search for full-time work. My husband came to a place of needing colon surgery, and I needed to be available as his helpmeet, advocate in the hospital, and caretaker when he came home and was healing. Had I taken on a new full-time job, our finances might have been better, but that’s not what was most important. And I didn’t know this, but God did. And He guided me in the right direction. And now, on the other side of it, He has guided me to accept some more cleaning clients to help with the finances. It’s not that more work is wrong, it’s just that it’s not always the answer – for that time. Now, the work doesn’t feel burdensome or like something I’m taking on because I’m stuck and have no choice. It feels like a blessing to be able to direct my care towards other families that need help, while my husband is at work and my kids are at school; and a blessing to be able to help my husband with the financial load.

Back to that verse again…John‬ ‭10‬:‭9‬-‭10‬ ‭NKJV‬‬- “I am the door. If anyone enters by Me, he will be saved, and will go in and out and find pasture. / The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. / I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.”

Listen- these verses can certainly be applied to much more important, vital, and especially eternal situations. But they can also be applied to anything the Holy Spirit shines them as a light on! He cares about everything we go through! He wants to help us through it!

He wants to make a way where there is no way…

Help us walk through walls…

Literally, HE is the door!

HE- coming to Him- is the way through!

The enemy wants you to think you’re stuck – and that you have to do things the world’s way in order to get unstuck. “That’s just the way it is.”

But Jesus has come not just so we might have eternal life, which will be the best! But also so that we can live more abundantly now! Which doesn’t mean that He will make us all rich or give us a life without any hard things or problems. It means that when we do face those things, He will help us through.

Sometimes life closes a window…

Always, Jesus will be an open door. 🚪❤️❤️❤️

(Totally reminds me of that Disney song lyric…

Love is an open door. 🎶 😘)

I love to go for walks, and I also love to look for and expect God to speak to me through e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g!

Over the last few years l’ve discovered a new and most unexpected outlet for His reminders: trash.

So whenever I go on a walk, I look for “trash talk”…l pick it up and examine it before throwing it away, and in this way it’s a double win- I get a kick out of how He encourages, and whatever place I’m walking at gets some TLC!

Well, it has been awhile since I found anything that really spoke to me. And I was thinking that in my head as I was driving down the road to meet my husband for a lunch-break walk at the pond near our house. 

Now of course I know that God knows my thoughts, but it never ever fails to delight me when He responds to them, especially as quickly as He did this time! 

I park my van, open the door, and directly beside me in the parking lot is this little pumpkin tag— just trash someone had discarded, or better to assume— that had blown away from someone’s flowers down the yard. 😉 Regardless of how it got there though, it was perfectly timed and it made me literally laugh out loud as I read it!

So personal. 

Such a timely reminder for me!

Here is what it said, and what He said to me through it:

———

“#12 Hardy Mum:”

(My daughter’s volleyball 🏐 number is 12!)

(Hardy Mum— Hardy Mom)

(How to be a hardy mom…)

(Definition of hardy… “robust; capable of enduring difficult conditions”)

———

Care:

“Full sun”

(Take care of yourself my staying full of the Son!) ☀️ 

———

“Water & Fertilize moderately:”

(God uses both the good stuff 🍶 and the “poop” 💩 for our good!)

———

And probably my favorite and most-needed reminder— “Pick off spent blooms to promote continuous blooming” 🌻 🤯 

(We have to let go of the past— even the parts that were once beautiful, the seasons we don’t want to see go— and embrace the present, in order to receive the gift of living in gratitude today. In order to promote continuous blooming! I love this so much!) 

———

✨ All together now:

“How to be a robust mom, capable of enduring difficult conditions… Take care of yourself by staying full of the Son…Remember, God uses the good and the crappy both for our good… Let go of the past, don’t be afraid to pick off spent blooms, in order to promote continuous blooming!” ✨ 

———

Amen. Amen. Amen!

Just wanted to share today. 

We never know how God will speak to us- if we are always talking to Him and waiting eagerly for His replies! 

He is the best conversationalist! 

Mere language is not enough for Him. 

He can use EVERYTHING – even trash! 🗑️ 

Nothing goes to “waste” with Him! (And no— no I couldn’t resist a good pun! 😉)