Last night we picked our kids up from youth camp, and-since we got to be there for their last chapel- I had a tearing up moment too as I watched my daughter (who didn’t know that I was there yet or watching her) totally immersed in worship, hands up eyes closed – bold and unashamed, un-self-conscious. 🙌🏻✝️🔥❤️
It took me right back to the moment I was on the beach years ago, praying desperately for a baby and I told God that if He would grant my desire I would see to it that I’d do everything I could to “give my children back to Him”- as in, to help them know who He is and walk with Him.
At that time we were only sporadically going to church even and I had no idea that I could really KNOW God personally. In fact this was the very first time that I had ever asked Him to show me himself- by asking for a sand dollar to show up on the beach if He could hear me and if He would grant me this desire. And He did! I’ve shared the story before and I won’t share it again in length here, but He DID, and it was AMAZING and I KNEW it was Him!
Thirteen years later, I’m watching my twelve year old daughter and my almost fifteen year old son worshiping Him along with some of our other youth group kids which I’ve grown to love, and I’m just taken aback. WOW are you good, God.
Over the years there have been times when I felt like such a failure as a parent, telling God “I don’t know how to ‘give them back to you’- I feel totally inadequate at teaching them about you, so many other parents seem to be doing a much better job of storing the Word in their kids’ hearts.”
In this moment He said to me, “Daylene, I never needed you to ‘give them back’, I only wanted you to give yourself over to me fully and let them watch what happens as you do that…let them SEE it, and FEEL it and be A PART of it.
Let them see you talking to me when you’re afraid of traffic and white-knuckling the steering wheel.
Let them see you crying out to me when you’re grieving and see that though you might have been HARD pressed on every side by pain you were not crushed because you had me helping to hold you up!
Let them see you in the sanctuary with your hands up and your eyes closed and -even in a room full of people where old you would have felt self-conscious, forgetting yourself entirely because you’ve entered in to my presence.
Let them hear you with your headphones on and singing my praises unashamed and at the top of your lungs as you clean the house, or march around the living room in warfare prayer.
Let them see you being prayed over whenever something has you feeling “frozen” in your faith. Ask them to be a part of praying over you, actually, the prayers of our youth a POWERFUL!
Let them see you “unfreezing others” who are struggling, and it doesn’t look like anything fancy- just sitting around the table with a cup of coffee and ears to listen and a mouth to speak and encourage and share testimony. And let them see how people always leave feeling lighter and you always feel more joyful for having been a part of it!
Let them see you accepting help and offering it, even though both involve humbling yourself sometimes.
And let them see—(and this is a different one)—even though they are at the very top of the list of the most important relationships in your life—they’re not first.
As much as it’s normal to make kids our first in life, it’s a place they weren’t designed to hold for us. They can’t handle all the pressure that comes with being MOST needed. How will they ever launch into what God has for their futures if they’re afraid to leave and leave that big of a whole in our hearts?
So give them the gift of being not first but third.
After your personal relationship with Jesus, your heavenly husband.
After your relationship with their dad, your earthly husband.
But yes-a personal relationship with them comes before all the rest- your friendships, your work, even before your service in the church.
(And both of these things can leave you feeling guilty-
not putting them first before me or your husband,
and not putting service first before family,
but don’t let it.
It’s MY design-He reminds me-
Not a decision you’re making on your own.
And having this modeled for them (even though you won’t be perfect at it) will help them have a good foundation for their own lives.)
You can’t give them to me, Daylene,
He confides in me.
They will have to choose themselves to come to me- for a personal relationship like you have.
Just be mine, beloved. BE LOVED.
Trust that I am God and I’ll pursue their hearts just like I pursued yours.
And in the meantime- keep sharing with them
what my voice sounds like,
what my leading looks like,
and how it always aligns with my Word.
And simply encourage them to pursue me too.
Being patient, at times when the growth seems slow and remembering how it took you awhile too.
And being in awe at times when a growth spurt hits- when the Spirit falls on them- and though they’re so young you can see me doing something that only I can do!
You can see now that my plans for you have always been good. My plans for your kids -and all your “bonus kids” at youth group- are SO good too! ❤️
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